Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

This week you’ll have the opportunity to get a copy of Dan Caro’s life story—The Gift of Fire: How I Made Adversity Work for Me.  Dan is a professional jazz drummer and inspirational speaker and a man of exquisite courage and spirit. You saw him play the drums on my most recent PBS special Excuses Begone! Dan banished excuses as a tiny child when he survived an injury by fire that destroyed both of his hands and almost took his life. Dan survived and grew up loving music and wanting to be a musician. He found a way to play the drums and play them well, proving to the world that the only limits in life are those you create for yourself. When Dan isn’t playing jazz in his native city of New Orleans, he is traveling the country encouraging others not just to overcome life’s hardships, but to view adversity as a gift that can drive us toward reaching our full potential. Dan is passing on the love and support that buoyed him up through the years, giving his all to life in a way that few of us are challenged to do. Dan also serves as an Ambassador for the Shriners of North America, whose hospitals provide specialized medical care for children, including treatment for burn victims. Think of Dan the next time you are tempted to pull out that ever-popular excuse “It will be difficult.” Dan took the gift of fire and used it to fuel the powerful spirit of his extraordinary life.

What’s the difference between our authentic self and the false self created by ego? Authentic self wonders: How may I serve? Ego’s attitude, on the other hand, is: Gimme, gimme, gimme—I need more, and I can never be satisfied. When we align with ego’s voice, the universe provides experiences that match the Gimme, gimme, gimme energy. It may not seem obvious at first, but if we pay attention, it’s quite clear that this energy creates pressure, anxiety, and stress. Why? Because allying with ego means that we’ve chosen to live in a demanding environment. We simply haven’t realized that we have a choice to join forces with our authentic ideals and live in a nondemanding environment. The Law of Attraction works either way!

The more we demand from the universe, the more is demanded of us. The more we give away, the more is given to us. It’s truly a simple matter of attitudinal energy generated from within ourselves. Consistently thinking of needing more attracts that needy energy back to us. When we consistently generate thoughts of giving, however, we attract the energy of giving back to us.

Lao-tzu speaks of the “absolute joy and freedom” we can experience by aligning ourselves with the practice of “kindness and selflessness.” My new book The Shift: Taking Your Life from Ambition to Meaning is a contemporary interpretation of this ancient teaching. I hope to impart that “Meaning” is not achieved through your ego and its selfish ways, but through the part of yourself that is selfless. Lao-tzu speaks of practicing “undiscriminating virtue”—this is your path to the freedom and joy that characterize a purposeful life.

Think about all the people who share the stage with you as you move through life. Can you affirm that everyone you need shows up, and that they’re perfect in every way for whatever needs you have at the time? In this intelligent system that you’re a part of, everything arrives from the field of intention where the infinite, invisible life force flows through everyone and everything. This includes you, and everyone else as well. Trust in this invisible life force and the all-creating mind that intends everything into existence.

I suggest that you do a quick review, and note all of the people who’ve shown up as characters in this play called your life. It has all been perfect. Your ex-spouse showed up at just the right time—when you needed to create those children you love so much. The father who walked out on you so that you could learn self-reliance left right on time. The lover who abandoned you was a part of this perfection. The lover who stayed with you was also taking his or her cues from Source. The good times, the struggles, the tears, the abuse—all of it involved people coming into your life and then leaving.

This is your past, and whatever your energy level at the time, whatever your needs, whatever your station in life, you attracted the right people and events to you. You may feel that they didn’t show up when you needed them, that in fact, you were alone and no one showed up at all, but I urge you to see it from the perspective of all of life being in divine order. If no one showed up, it was because you needed to handle something on your own and therefore attracted no one at that time. Viewing the past as a play in which all the characters and all entrances and exits were scripted by your Source and represent what you attracted at the time, frees you from guilt, regret, and even revenge.

As a result, you’ll go from being an actor who’s influenced by others playing the roles of producer and director, to being the writer, producer, director, and star of your glorious life. You’ll also be the casting director who possesses the ability to audition anyone you choose. Base your choices on taking the path of no resistance and staying harmonized with the ultimate producer of this entire drama: our universal all-creating Source.

As the father of eight and grandfather of six, I’ve been blessed with abundant opportunities to be present with babies. That’s how I know the amazing lessons that we can all learn from observing babies and trying to emulate their joy. You didn’t come forth into this world to suffer, to be anxious, fearful, stressful, or depressed. You came from the God-consciousness of joy. Just watch little babies. They’ve done nothing to be so happy about. They don’t work; they poop in their pants; and they have no goals other than to expand, grow, and explore this amazing world. They love everyone, they’re completely entertained by a plastic bottle or goofy faces, and they’re in a constant state of love—yet they have no teeth, no hair, and they’re pudgy and flatulent. How could they possibly be so joyful and easily pleased? Because they’re still in harmony with the Source that intended them here; they have no resistance to being joyful. Be like that baby you once were in terms of being joyful. You don’t need a reason to be happy…your desire to be so is sufficient. And in case your world is short on newborns right now, take a look at Anna Quindlen and Nick Kelsh’s wonderful new photo book Naked Babies for a visit to the world of the youngest among us.