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It’s No Accident

Looking back over my life, I can see the most amazing patterns emerge. Connections and synchronicities are always there—whether we can spot them in the moment or not. This is a Universe where there are no accidents. Here’s one example:

When I was 27 and working as a counselor in a high school in Michigan, I gave a talk to the parents one night about what I hoped to offer their sons and daughters that school year. The next day a student named Nancy came into my office with a book. Her mother had attended my talk the night before and decided to offer me a bonus volume she had received from the Book-of-the-Month Club. Nancy explained that, based on what I had said in my talk, her mom thought I would like this compendium of great thought—a collection of work by famous philosophers, scholars, and poets. Amazingly, that book changed the course of my life.

It happened that I was scheduled to talk to my new doctoral advisor at Wayne State University that night. I had to declare a plan, a direction for my course of study. I had hours to pass after school and before my appointment at Wayne State so I sat down to take a look at Nancy’s mom’s book. There I read an essay by Abraham Maslow called “The Whole Man.” Maslow argued that instead of spending time investigating the behavior and treatment of the most troubled and dysfunctional people, psychologists should take a new tack and study the lives and habits of the self-actualized person. “The study of self-actualized people must be the source of a whole new universal science of psychology,” said Maslow. He had observed a small percentage of people who appeared to live at an exalted level of consciousness—the self-actualized.

By that night when I met with my advisor and mentor Dr. Mildred Peters at Wayne State, I had completely changed my plans for doctoral study.  I told her, “I don’t want to study what’s wrong with people. I want to study what’s right.” The only difference I had with Maslow was the idea that only a small percentage of humans were capable of becoming self-actualized. If one person can do it, I thought, then why can’t everyone do it? And so began my course of study into how lives can be made better through self-awareness. When we realize who we are, when we find our highest selves, there are no limits.

FILED UNDER: wayne dyer, doctoral study, psychology, abraham maslow, self-actualization, book of the month club

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Comments (28)

  • 1.
    January 2, 2013
    9:47 am

    In June 2011 I was in our doctors' waiting room and picked up a magazine.It opened to a page with a tiny advertisment for The Renascence in Toronto, Canada. I knew this was for me. I needed help with my alcohol addiction. I called the number, signed myself in and my life has been totally transformed. An accident?

    - Siem
  • 2.
    January 2, 2013
    9:56 am

    I can see the patterns in my own life. Experiences happen that seem horrible at the time but prepare you for the future. Your blob helped remind me that we are not in control - and when we live consciously; purposefully no matter what comes our way we can deal with it. We all can use that reminder once in a while! Thank you

    - Cindy
  • 3.
    January 2, 2013
    9:59 am

    Yes. In a world that teaches personal vulnerability and powerlessness, most energy is spent protecting and defending the fragile identity we think we are. The hidden price of safety is freedom, but harmlessness and joy become the natural states of those who learn the certainty of their true Beingness, and step-out into life. It's everyone's right.

    - Dennis
  • 4.
    January 3, 2013
    1:49 am

    once again your blogs appear in my in box on queue - Thankyou for reminding me of this.

    - gillian
  • 5.
    January 3, 2013
    5:40 pm

    In 1991 and met a great guy there who changed my life. His mere presence inspired me to be all I could be. He was diagnosed with Hodgkin's disease and tragically succumbed in 2001 at the age of 33. I am now married to his wife and raising their daughter, well she is my daughter too. There are no accidents, there just can't be.

    - Arthur
  • 6.
    January 3, 2013
    8:39 pm

    You will not know what Nature brings you until you reached it. Stay positive to reach a positive ending or a new beginning!

    - Joe
  • 7.
    January 3, 2013
    9:56 pm

    Everything happens just as it should. We can all realize our potential. It all comes from our Source. Thanks for the reminder. Namaste!

    - Joseph Wadas
  • 8.
    January 4, 2013
    4:04 pm

    We think everything is randam and we have no control. Yet everything and everyone is connected and once we step away from our Ego and truly begin to see our inner self - our spirit we begin to see how it all comes together. How we are truly unified in this cosmic experience. We help each other grow like the rain falls and the sun shines.

    - Shireen
  • 9.
    January 5, 2013
    2:37 am

    Last summer I almost signed a life changing contract, but at the last minute the other party pulled out. I was so sure and thought I had calculated carefully and planned for everything, I have been devastated and have had an incredibly hard time grieving and trying to put back the shattered pieces of my life together and return to normal.

    - Audacity
  • 10.
    January 5, 2013
    7:01 am

    Those that do well in this life are those that take the opportunity to learn and develop in all situations. It's what the apostle Paul recommends - to give thanks in all circumstances. It's a tough lesson but the long term gains are phenomenal!

    - David
  • 11.
    January 5, 2013
    7:09 am

    I like your post Dennis! Natural Law fits in here and with Dr. Dyer's philosophy of self actualization. At least I see the fit. I'm in the very beginning of my education with Dr. Dyer, but I already see the power of it all. I am hopeful for the first time in a long time.

    - Tim
  • 12.
    January 6, 2013
    12:25 pm

    In wanting life filed with togetherness, is now a separated family, turmoil and sadness, with addiction, past issues and loneliness. How to find my strong faith again in my prayers for healing with such confusion and heart break. You blogs & radio help. But I need the help to find the peace and the holy spirit to help each. thanks Love God Bless

    - Karen
  • 13.
    January 7, 2013
    2:56 am

    I have synchronicity moments regularly; miracles, and invariably it's when I am "following my bliss" , doing the things I love to do. Nothing is an accident or a coincidence. There are days when it's quite magnificent and you can feel the touch of the Divine. Thank you for your many reminders. Best wishes

    - Dianne
  • 14.
    January 7, 2013
    2:22 pm

    Eager to attend Dr Dyer's Maui conferences, I purchased airlines ticket, hotel arrangements. Then, I found myself without employment- twice now, unexpectedly! What's the correlation? Im excited about attending and the wealth and love of information learned.

    - Maria
  • 15.
    January 7, 2013
    7:02 pm

    Dear Wayne, I was blessed to meet you on a flight from HNL to SYD on the 1/1/12, this would be the first day of the year that changed my life!! I know we will meet again and i hope to share the story of my SHIFT with you. May God bless you always, you are my greatest teacher!! Monica

    - Monica
  • 16.
    January 12, 2013
    5:28 am

    The Colleridge quote you used to promote "Wishes Fulfilled" was the first of several synchronicities which led me to a new way at looking at my world. Synchronously the dandelion has become a metaphor for me and magically when I was scratching my head , I saw there were dandelions on the cover page of your book.. No accidents! Thanks teacher.

    - Maz
  • 17.
    January 14, 2013
    12:14 pm

    My It's No Accident happened about 9 months ago. I was feeling very lonely & so I went to our temple. While sitting in the chapel I closed my eyes & said, God, I wish when I open my eyes my friend, Gloria, would be sitting next to me. Can you imagine the love I felt from God when I opened my eyes, & Gloria was sitting beside me? Blessings & Joy,

    - Ginny
  • 18.
    January 14, 2013
    11:10 pm

    I can see clearly all of the little pieces of my life coming together. It's so amazing-the more I connect, the more I see and understand! I'm now in the "spark mode". If a spark can make me feel this wonderful I can't wait for it to ignite! God Bless You Dr. Dyer

    - Maureen
  • 19.
    January 17, 2013
    10:31 am

    Doctor reading this text and your magical areas, wanted to consult that even I can not see the reason why I had to go through a bad experience and still not see what helped me Greetings Carolina

    - Carolina
  • 20.
    January 18, 2013
    2:34 am

    Your book "Inspiration" changed my life. I feel very much the "inspiration", this incredible connection to God, to the Life, to the universe. I feel like being an instrument of kindness, wisdom and peace. I would like to send my sincere thanks and my eternal gratitude to Dr. Dyer. From France,

    - Christine
  • 21.
    January 20, 2013
    10:44 pm

    I think when we talk about this, we are forgetting the perfection behind every act... this universe is not an accident therefore everything which happens inside it including our actions and thoughts are not accidents.. this is how we as humans have been programmed.

    - Adnan
  • 22.
    January 25, 2013
    5:20 pm

    Everything that happens to us does have a reason. At the end of the day, those mistakes or coincidences may help us in the future.

    - timeworthybooks
  • 23.
    January 26, 2013
    7:23 am

    Last winter I have received a stone in my windshield. I knew I had 2 options: got angry or learn somethings. I decide the 2nd option. During the garage mechanic fix it, I spend a special moment with my best friend During the discussion, I understood somethings very important about myself. Thanks God!

    - Simon
  • 24.
    January 28, 2013
    7:21 pm

    Finding the common theme and synchronicity of life is so powerfully healing and joyous. Thankyou for sharing this story. Namaste, Dr. Dyer.

    - Simone
  • 25.
    February 1, 2013
    12:15 pm

    I am doing a doctoral study in a field that is defined by problems rather than solutions.I want to avoid deficit profiling of vulnerable populations, so your article has come along at the right time as I have an opportunity to reframe my proposal.

    - Ruth
  • 26.
    February 26, 2013
    11:03 am

    I had a daughter who suffered from depression in which she chose drugs to self meditate, and the drugs took her life at 18. The attention on her depression became her identity. Focus on what's right and that will grow. I am blessed to have this level of awareness now. Thank you Wayne~

    - Cindy
  • 27.
    February 26, 2013
    6:53 pm

    Mr. Dyer i have been following you 14 years now. I am a 50 y/o unpublished author trying to spread the word as well and have been on my journey of self-discovery 7 years now. chk out my wordpress.com blog Kujichaguliaizu. Continue to inpire Peace and Blessings 2 U..

    - john
  • 28.
    January 26, 2014
    9:45 pm

    Respected Dr. Dyer, I am an indian practicing as Counselling Psychologist. I have been conducting audio visual seminars for last more than 20 years. I am highly impressed and inspired by your teachings. I saw many of your videos on youtube and I must say I am blessed to come in contact with you. Is it possible to share something through email?

    - Chandrakant Page, India

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