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Stay Loose

Whether you are waiting to return a serve on the tennis court or listening for your name to be called for a job interview, your instinct is to stay loose. Be ready, be flexible, be poised to respond when the time is right. Staying loose is part of living in the present moment. Your readiness to move is part of your wisdom and gives you the power you need to live your best life. In the 76th verse of the Tao Te Ching, Lao-tzu describes the flexibility that living things possess: “All things, including the grass and trees, are soft and pliable in life.” He contrasts that living pliability with the dry and brittle quality of death. Choosing to remain flexible is choosing life: “A tree that cannot bend will crack in the wind.”

You may have been taught that strength is measured by how “hard” you are in your thinking or how inflexible you are in your opinions and that weakness is associated with those who bend. But when confronted with any stressful situation, keep in mind that being stiff won’t get you very far, whereas being flexible will carry you through.

Change the way you think about strength. Aren’t the physically and mentally strong those who can bend and adapt to life—especially as we age? The more you think in rigid ways, refraining from considering other points of view, the more you’re liable to break. As Lao-tzu reminds us, “The hard and stiff will be broken,” while “the soft and supple will prevail.” Our minds and our bodies need flexibility to thrive. When we see ourselves as flexible and supple, we are able to bend in harmony with our Divine source. By listening, yielding, and being gentle, we all become disciples of life.

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ziyah says:

I love YOU Wayne Dyer… I love it all. Hope you are happily enjoying your yoga practice and a beautiful life in Maui. I’ll let you and Kerry know if I am over there so we can have a massage party 🙂

Looking forward to another trip/seminar w/you somewhere in the coming year.

Frances says:

Dear Wayne, I have listened to you on PBS for years. Thank you.
So very happy that you are again healthy.
I’ve contacted John of God for long distance healing. Been through a long weird experience not in my realm of intention. Any advice you might have regarding this would be very much appreciated. Blessings to you.

William Porter says:

Thanks Wayne for bringing much needed insight into a chaotic time in my life where I know I need to focus and meditate. Much love for you and your family.


Vegard says:

Thank you so much Wayne.
In 2001, someone gave me your book Real magic. That really changed my life.
Through you I have experienced that things changes, only by looking at it in different ways. I have struggled many times, and it is not always easy, but it is like I now know a way.
I feel so much love for you.

Maria says:

This reminds me of something I read in an infertility-related book where the author says to be like bamboo. In a hurricane, the rigid oak tree can snap. Bamboo bends and twists and goes with the winds of the hurricane. Still strong, but also flexible. Good stuff.

Donna says:

Wayne, it is always so cool when I receive messages from God through all sources. In the last three years I have been through major changes in my life. I have had to let go and give up lots of my personal possessions…along with pieces of myself and tried to remain flexible. You have been a great influence and mentor to me. Thank you, Donna

Michelle says:

🙂 ….yes.

Frances says:

Re: Ego
Freud re-contextualized: Ego: The container energy field allowing for individual experience without infringement upon another’s individual experience. Experience of “otherness”. Ain’t it Grand!!!! What wonderful intelligent design!!! 🙂 I hope we can meet and chat one day.

Michelle says:

Wayne, no need to post this. The coincidences are an almost constant…and the things I say or show others then you post or speak of…just listened for first time to your radio podcast…this has found me. That compelling feeling to send you the cds was so not random.

zhalee says:

Dear Dr Dyer I hope I can meet you in my life.I wish you come in my country for speech. You know , you are my favorite author that I love his books and can get his minds. Thank you.

zhalee says:

You’re right dear Dr,Dyer. When we are hard against stream of life, it is easy to break by strong stream (hard problems). But I learned to be flexible against life and environment. This way help me to have a more relationship with other people and they trust to me. But we must have more patience too. God bless you.

Cheryl says:

Dear. Dr. Dyer, thank you for a gentle reminder of one of life’s most crucial requirements. I, myself have some challenges adhering to it. But listening to your words helps to calm the hostile emotions that rise when I experience a obstacle of some kind.

James says:

Thank you Wayne! See you in Tampa next month…woo hoo!!!!

Kai Lee says:

I had met an unusual character sometime ago who wanted to change me from a gentle and contented person to a aggressive and greedy one. I ended giving up the relationship that had also cost me my career. In a sense, I was unbending and break under the force. My question is, shall we be bending to a tyrant?

Michelle says:

Aloha Wayne-I awakened today knowing what your always knew. It was not about me and not about you. For the first time in my life I need not explain. I know now too we are on the same plane. -beyond words!

Mucunda says:

a great article as always.
one big hello to you

Marek says:

I have found that being flexible in life and generally all things makes for a calm, peaceful life. The benefit to myself and others is infinite.

Dennis says:

Yes. One form of bending that has occured to me lately is: if I think of myself as good, and therefore expect good from others, I must think good of them. This, instead of the judgment that refuses to flex.

Vikki says:

I can bend but I cannot break!. Thank you Wayne. You are always the voice of reason.

Sarah says:

I loved it. I needed to be reminded that flexibility, adaptability and going with the flow are really what I need to live by.
It takes the pressure way off and allows me to breath and relax again.

Thank you Dr. Dyer 🙂

Mario says:

This is the third month with you Wayne Dyer. You now the line: I am not worthy to you come in my house, just say the word and my soul will be healed. I do the jappa every day. And last friday I was in the light and I came in to VOID, like you said, expirience death before you die. Very soon I will shake your hand. Mario Stosic, Zagreb, Croatia