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Give Me a Cranky Waiter

Do you avoid the supermarket line with the crabby clerk who is flinging the groceries across the scanner while scowling at the customers? Try this experiment which I love to practice. See if you can convert the cranky clerk, the surly waiter, or the rude, impatient public employee with a dose of kindness and courtesy. It makes a great chance to cultivate the third cardinal virtue spoken of by Lao-tzu: gentleness, which manifests as kindness and consideration for others. Gentleness means accepting life and people as they are—leading the way to peaceful relationships. Kindness is contagious. Modeling it opens the door for the cranky, the surly, the rude, and the crabby to let go of what really are uncomfortable, unhappy, and unrewarding feelings. Smiling and showing consideration for someone’s feelings, pointing out something positive to focus on are ways I like to use in my efforts to convert those who are clearly suffering in their appointed tasks and need help to feel better. Remember the calling of our Divine nature—“How may I serve?” We can serve by offering a helping of kindness to those who serve us and enjoy the pleasure of lifting them up to a more peaceful, joyful place.




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Kristen says:

It is in God’s will that we will find in our hearts the true meaning of Free Will. Our free will that is given to us is that we have the choice to love one another without suffering. You see life isn’t an individual sport. It’s a team sport.

Richard says:

College psych grad student, initiated and blessed by gurus, studied various Christian, Hindu & metaphysical paths, had spiritual awakening: clean & sober 18 yrs. hands-on healings, practicing Buddhist chanting mantra and meditation daily for years, enlightenment is within and always present in this moment NOW. When will I become fully enlightened?

Donna says:

I bought the excuses begone on CD, with Ram Dass. I feel the same, I could just hear his voice and I cry because of the love that radiates from him. I want to visit him on a retreat, and the excuses begone with help me to get their. I had a heart to heart with him, and have fallen inlove with him ever since. Thank you for introducing him to me.

Dr. Jennifer Howard says:

Yes, I couldn’t agree more that kindness is contagious. I have found that opening my heart to any rude person and speaking kind, calm words back to them often turns the situation around. Even if it doesn’t I have planted my small seed of understanding with a person who may be really having a hard time. Dr. Jennifer Howard

Linda says:

Discovering your work reassures me that my heart and soul are connected and that I AM NOT CRAZY like so many people have told me I am for being a “pushover”. THANK YOU FOR ALL THAT YOU DO!!!!

Kurt says:

How wonderful seeing you, Wayne in Chicago! Best of luck with the personal issues you shared, I will send you love and light in my meditations. The idea of watching our sugar intake was an eye opener. A little research easily reveals the truth about what we put into our bodies. Thank you for who you are and what you do.

Kathryn says:

I wanted to drop a note to thank you — I just found “the gap” — it did seem hard at first but your CD was absolutely incredible. Through your book and CD, I was able to get into that space — the space between. And it was inspiring. I realize it is not your current book but I am still catching up!

angela says:

I have been totally inspired to write about my passion. My life experiences have led me to write a book about mindfulness, empowerment and individual power as it relates to domestic violence and dating for young teens.I also lecture around the area. Thanks so much for all I have learned and applied to my life from your teachings. Blessings

angela says:

Hi Wayne, YES, I agree 100%. All of my colleaques always want to know why I get the pleasant patients and the ones that never complain. It is all a matter of what I put out, a smile, a kind word, a compliment and time to really listen goes a long long way and it makes me feel better also….Angela

Sara says:

WAYNE DYER, even though you say its a bad thing to have idols and make people heroes i have to say this: You’re my hero. You saved my life. I LOVE YOU.
guess you wont read this but if you do know that you changed my life.

Love from Sweden

Katrien says:

I have another cereal for you that has no sugar !! Kashi 7 whole grain puffs!! After hearing you talk about the sugar contents in all the foods, and the success you had cutting it out ( you looked Fabulous in L.A.) I tried it and low and behold…4 pounds in 5 days!!! I’m not talking junk, which I rarely eat, but regular foods..

Harald says:

There is only one “problem” for me with this. I never meet a “cranky waiter” anymore… They just are not there in my life. I`m there to serve, not to get.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. Namaste

Jenny South Africa says:

It makes me so sad to say that I have tried this “forever”and I have reached a stage where I say NO MORE. I have found that when you are “nice”people think you are weak and try to walk all over you. I am 51 and have been down each and every “learning curve”, I ask why people have to be so hurtful? Enuf is now enuf. Where do I go to from here?

Joann Perillo says:

If teachers are feeling the love and peace you speak of, they would be inspired to share that love with all of their students. Just imagine every student growing older with the seed of love, kindness, compassion, generosity planted within their little hearts. WHAT A WONDERFUL WORLD IT WOULD BE.

Priti says:

Namste Dr Dyer!
My dream to get your blessings in person recently came true in Los Angeles. Among a crowd of 2000 people I had the privilege to meet you the Indian way and that connection has truly touched my soul.
Thank You for your love and kindness. I am eternally grateful.

Ashley says:

I just wanted to say thank you for such a wonderful show last night! You have changed my life and inspire me to live the way you mention. I can’t wait to read more of your books. Thank you again!! (21 yrs old)

Mark Ferrandino says:

Went to your show in New York last night. What a wonderful evening listening to you. Your new book excuses begone was a joy to read. Thanks for all you do here this was truly your calling God Bless You!!!!

Dominic says:

We just came home from your event and after deciding to change our way of thinking we were pleasantly surprised to find that something we have been trying to sell for months sold overnight. Also our agent informed us that tomorrow we will be putting a deal in writing for a house we have wanted to buy since January. Thank you.

Jenna Jacobs says:

I am 23 years old and just came home from your event ” Excuses Begone” in New York.There were close to 3000 people in the audience and I had to be one of the youngest people attending, along with your daughters. I’m absolutely INSPIRED by your show. Dr. Wayne Dyer, you are MY inspiration to continue on the path I am ALREADY living. THANK YOU!

Donna says:

When I was a waitress, I would play a game customers no one wanted take because of the lack of tips, or bad mood. I would take them. As time would pass they would come in and ask for me,and leave me a fair tip. As a Respiratory therapist when a patient shows appreciation for my work, it gives me a great feeling. Namaste,

Lane Mayhew says:

I was just writing for writing class how my dad was such unforgetable character. He loved to make people laugh. I took after him so much. When I was flew with TWA I used to pick the grumpiest person on the airplane and vow that I would make them laugh by the end of the trip. I always succeeded I am happy to say.