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Holy Relationships

“It is one of the most beautiful compensations of this life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself.”  This is Ralph Waldo Emerson’s description of the deep nature of relationship between ourselves and our fellow human beings. If you desire peace for others, you’ll receive it. If you want others to feel loved, you’ll be the recipient of love. If you see only beauty and worthiness in others, you’ll have the same returned to you. You’ll only give away what you have in your heart, and attract what you’re giving away. Your impact on others—whether it be strangers, family members, co-workers, or neighbors—is evidence of the strength of your connection to the power of intention. Think of your relationships in terms of holy or unholy.

Holy relationships facilitate the power of intention at a high energy level for everyone involved. Unholy relationships keep the energy at the lower, slower levels for all concerned. You’ll know your own potential for greatness when you start seeing the perfection in all relationships. When you recognize others’ holiness, you’ll treat them as divine expressions of the power of intention, wanting nothing from them. The irony is that they become co-creators manifesting all your desires. Want nothing from them, demand nothing from them, have no expectations for them, and they’ll return this kindness. Demand from them, insist that they please you, judge them as inferior, and see them as servants, and you’ll receive the same. It is in your best interest to be acutely aware of what you truly want for others, and to know whether you’re in a holy or an unholy relationship with every person you’re involved with.

One truth I’ve recognized during the years of my own growth is that it’s impossible to know my perfection if I’m unable to see and honor that same perfection in others. The ability to see yourself as an expression of intention and to see yourself in all of humanity is a characteristic of the holy relationship. It’s the ability to celebrate and honor in all others, the place where we’re all one.

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Ashley Mui says:

I love the idea of HOLY relationships. Some ways I celebrate and honor my holiness with myself and others is the 4 Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. Being intentional with these agreements plus the agreements I make with myself work magic and wonders. Eternally grateful.

Ana says:

Aloha Dr WD Please read this! All my life has been dedicated to a “miraculous” research to understand the human role and mind I lived India for 25 years “The Power of Intention” is my deep way An amazing power of healing has developet in me I need direct contact with you It’s very important for me I live on Oahu

Lakshmi says:

Thank you so much for all your wonderful insight! It has helped enormously in my day to day life!


Thanks Richard, your comment made it. I am at peace now

Richard says:

To those who want to meet Dr. Dyer, you act like he is God. Actually you are right, he is, but so is everyone. His wisdom is in all just waiting to be uncovered. Treat everyone as if they are Dr. Dyer (or God) in a clever disguise. He or she may be testing you to see if you can apply the wisdom you’ve learned or to compel you to learn more.

Richard says:

I’ve wondered what one concise message of guidance I could give to the young people I come in contact with. This it it.


Mike says:


Christopher Wayne says:

The only thing UN-HOLY or evil in this world of perfection is human thought. We are the ONLY objects in the world of form that was given choice. Our choice is to turn towards the Source or away. EVERY thing you can sence is a Holy relationship untill you make the choice to belive otherwise. The ego is the driving force behind this turning away.

ali Mohsenian says:

Dear dyer I wish I could meet you and I believe someday it happens.
Finally, sorry for my poor English and long comment I wish you a Long life with health and happiness.

Sincerely Yours

ali Mohsenian says:

I believe that, the only way for happiness is that, we should happy the others first,
If we happy the others the happiness will pass from our side and we become happy too.
I will do my best to be like you and I hope god help me in this way.

ali Mohsenian says:

We have some celestial poets, such as Hafez, Molana that in their poems have invited the people to GOD and I found that you are saying exactly what they said.
I believe that all the religions are the same and there is no any difference between them but unfortunately, these are the followers who are causing the differences.

ali Mohsenian says:

Dear Dr. Dyer
I am so happy that I knew you. I am from Iran and I am recently started reading the book of the power of intention. It is a great book and with this book I greatly impressed.
I realized that, all the people who are connected to that power saying one thing.


I really need some help here. How can I reach to this feeling of a holy relationship with my daughter? She’s got a very serious personality disorder. There is so much pain and fear. How in the world can I see this relationship perfect when the one you love suffers to the point of constantly harming herself? Breaks my heart….

Parag says:

Every duty is holy, and devotion to duty is the highest form of the worship of God – Swami Vivekananda so it is true in the life that you should have holy relationship were you see GOD in all and do your duty.

TJ says:

I have only recently become acquainted with Dr. Dyer and am now a serious student. Dr. Dyer, I must say ‘Thank-You!’ for the work you have done and the inspiration you have given me! Where have you been all my life? And thank-you for these words here, they come at an especially needed time. Namaste

Victoria says:

I love you Dr.Wayne!!!!!No matter what some people say!You changed my life!I hope and wish you that your live is full of love,well-being and Blessings!!!!!!!

Joseph Wadas says:

Holy relationships are one of the keys to fulfillment. Be kind to the kind. Be kind to the unkind. Pray that good things happen to those who hate you. If they do happen rejoice the prayers are answered. If not negativity still melts away. Namaste!


I came to your Blog to ask about friendship. And there it was. Thank you for the answer. It appears I have been demanding too much and setting expectations from my friends. It is time to let go and let life! Thank you again. I hope you are well.

Vickie says:

seeing one’s self in all humanity and seeing all as one is a principle that I believe and accept. everyone does not know, accept, or understand this principle. so, I have to be the flexible one. sometimes I get tired of having to be the one to flex

francesca says:

thank you, Mr Dyer.

Kenneth says:

Whenever I help someone, there is a magical feeling inside of me. I do not need acknowledgement. The reward is the deed itself. Within the deed, the relationship is made, a beautiful, wondrous connection which may gently fly away or solidify. As a result, my whole life has taken on new meaning and new possibilities.

Ali says:

We all love

Anita says:

Emerson also said “The only way to have a friend is to be one”. And so, my friend, I wish you perfect health. You gave up paradise for all of us. Thank you. As a poet I offer ” The Trial by Existence” by Robert Frost. As a BARA, I recommend Dr. Stanislaw Burzynski’s work with antineoplastins, and hope to meet you someday.
warmest regards,

Roxann says:

Thank You

Jess says:

Harder to do with family – so many expectations on both sides. The relationships feel so unholy at times…

Diane says:

Dr. Wayne, we are in a holy relationship, you and I. Your wisdom is always right on time. You speak the words my heart wants to say, and the wisdom my heart needs to hear. I’m so grateful, thank you so much. Happy Trails my holy friend.
Diane Shaffer

Lance says:

I live in Las Vegas and I really think you should come out here to speak. The city is hurting spiritually and the minute you arrive here you will actually feel the bad energy. Over two million people live here and many good families could use the positive messages you bring, along with an energy second to none, although I’m only assuming..

parvin says:

” I ” am one member of the ‘ UNIVERSE “, and if I have a comprehensive understanding of myself, it will be easy to percieve the other creatures. It leads me to believe in the meaning of ” gestalt “. I do not deny or ignore any creature in any place, at any time, because “I am the world”.

emily says:

I needed these words today to keep me going on my path. Spending time with my brother every day who is drinking around the clock and doesn’t see any way out. All I can do is love him…I needed the sign today that I am doing what I’m meant to do. He’s a perfect creation and that’s how I see him. Thank you.

Christopher Wayne says:

We also get alot of handicapable folks where I work since we are NC’s only River boat with an elevator. I was once handicapped and in a wheel chair for some time. I show the same holyness to these folks that I would have wanted for my self. Treat them all like a peace of God.

Christopher Wayne says:

I always try to facilitate holy relationships wherever I go. Especialy at work. I deal with the public alot on the river boat and some folks have an attitude when they board. They dont know that they have entered a Holy relationship. They just know the kindness and non judgemental presence.

Penny says:

….:)…thank you..always grateful!

Mucunda says:

It s the ability to celebrate and honor in all others the place where we re all one

Wonderful article I always make my effort to have it present in my life